Codependency



Somehow the hand that reached out
And touched me in the night wasn't yours
Just a puffy and bland phantasmagorical hand
I felt no need to shout, no need to act out
And I woke up in a cold sweat just before three
Had to check on my phone to see if you'd messaged me
I don't need to feel important, just necessary
Although my psychotherapist wouldn't agree
I want to help somebody to need me

Codependency
It's a nasty new word for love, you see
Brought from therapy
But fuck therapy
It never made me happy
Like you make me happy
You're important to me
I like to feel necessary
But whose hand is this hand?

The touch in the darkness was clammy and damp
And I'd been sure I was alone
It seems I wasn't at the seashore, I knew that for sure
Because the sheets on the bed were dry as a bone
So I snapped on the lamp and no-one was there
No skeletal vamp and no skull with lank hair
It was probably just some prank
Pulled off by a cuck or a crank
Some joker working late at the bank

Codependency
Sticks and stones may break my bones
But you can never hurt me
It's horses for courses
I'll get my coat, I'll be here all night
The hand has got me by the throat
I've even stopped believing all the things I say
They're so bland
But whose hand is this helping hand?

And you finally called me at three
To tell me your night was full of policemen
And could I come round
To tape garbage bags over your window
To block out the light and the sound?
As I belted my raincoat, in a sudden flash of lightning
I thought I could see some kind of horrible projection
On my tallboy in the shape of a small boy
Without a face of any kind
And just a horrible hole
Where there should normally be a mind

Codependency
Just another new word
To terrify me
And I'm already so scared
That you're abandoning me
And I don't trust myself
Don't know what's come over me
You're belittling me
But no one else would care for you
The way I care for you
Can't you see?
More than I care for myself
There's nobody else
But whose hands are these?



Becoming You



You promised us a system worth believing in
Where we could flourish in the sun
A world we could move freely through
And raise our children in
Where Justice raised a sword for everyone
And then we started noticing the way you got things done
The lobbying, corruption and the pain
With faltering enthusiasm we still stumbled on
Through the rain

We studied to get good at something
Flourished, took a bow
Won some paltry colours on the way
Cut some corners, told some lies
Blew up some holy cows
But we were never holier than they
The closer that we got to you
The filthier we felt
Contracting your corruption by the hour
So much for the glory, so much for high ideals
We became the filthy functionaries of power
It's not as if we really fancied dying in the cause
You never offered things worth dying for
In comfortable humiliation still we stumbled on
Hoping to get through
Without becoming you

Never tell me pragmatism is a dirty word
You know it puts the bacon on the plate
You've seen the losers falling one by one away
As their dreams of adequacy fade
And the closer that we got to you
Through all the time we gave
Enacting your corruption by the hour
Added up to nothing, at the end of every day
But an urgent need to take an endless shower
And time is running out for all the things we planned to do
To make this world a better place
And so we stumble on, it's what we've grown accustomed to
Becoming you
Becoming you



Staring a Hole



Stop staring a hole
Through my disguise
This isn't a mask, it's my real face
These are my eyes
This whole time they've been hiding in plain sight
Subject and object
Day and night

You're staring a hole
To get down with me
You're staring a hole into my soul
Under my sea
I could stare you into Eternity
I'll stare you to the Stone Age
Wait and see

My name's Whaddya Care
My home's Anywhere
I travel this world without paying a fare
The people all stare
The faster I run the slower I can move
The less I stare the less I care I don't improve

And Fate gives you gifts
You shouldn't decline
Now close your eyes
I'll keep 'em with mine
You've been networking with criminals and creeps
They all give you the glad eye
But they'll stab you in your sleep

Stop staring this hole
Through my disguise
This isn't a mask, it's my real face
These are my eyes
This whole time they've been hiding in plain sight
Subject and object
Day and night



Before the War



It's hardly a utopia
With the crackheads and the whores
The zombies zonked on fentanyl
Sleeping in doors
Are these the days
Before the war?
A mass murderer in the Kremlin
A dodderer in the White House
The Middle East a slaughterhouse
Again

What
What are we heading for?
What
Would we be fighting for?
While there's still light
While there's still food
Water's still wet
And love is still good
This could all pass for
The good old days
Before the war

With laughter in my wrinkles
And a jingle in my stride
With the people of the earth
I am marching side by side
Towards Christ knows what
A chatbot took my livelihood
A rat moved in next door
My landlady's a Russian
Dressed in fake Dior
It could be worse

What
Should I be laughing for?
Who
Would this nightmare work for?
We're not insane
There's still sun, there's still rain
Death is still cold, love's still a pain
It still passes for
The good old days before the war

Yesterday I saw you
Drinking bubble tea
Wading in the Taiwan Strait
Waiting for me
Trying
To catch a wave
I used to watch your Tiktok
Before it was forbidden
You wanted me to envy you
I did
And then I didn't

What
What are we heading for?
What
Got into you all?
Have you learned nothing at all
From your previous downfall
The good old days
Before the war?



Waterspout





Insy winsy man, sputtering away
The thoughts in your head
The strings on your web
And all the other insy men
Coming round to play
Make a man of string, set fire to him
Governor of Canada, Ambassador to Spain
We are all the same, insy winsy men

My spiderflesh, creeps and crawls
Weeps and bawls
Nothing I can do
Can put me back together with you
Spiderflesh, human flesh
Any flesh at all
Ultimately fails, ultimately falls

Little Miss Tough It Out
Wonder what that's all about?
Spin it in, spin it out
Your weeping waterspout
Little Miss Tease It Out
Squeeze it in, sleaze it out
Freeze it in, or freak it out
Your weeping waterspout

Insy winsy man, withering away
The thoughts in your head
The lines in your day
And all the other insy men
Coming round to play
Make a man of string, make a man of clay
Emperor of Russia or Pontiff at The Hague
We are all the same, insy winsy men

My spiderflesh, creeps and crawls
Weeps and bawls
Nothing I can do
Can put me back together with you
Spiderflesh, human flesh
Any flesh at all
Ultimately fails, ultimately falls

Little Miss Tough It Out
Wonder what that's all about?
Spin it in, spin it out
Your weeping waterspout
Little Miss Tease It Out
Squeeze it in, sleaze it out
Freeze it in, or freak it out
Your weeping waterspout

Insy winsy man
Dangling away
The thoughts in your head
The strings on your web
Governor of Canada, Ambassador to Spain
We are all the same, insy winsy men



Beautiful Human Life



We need to be
Beautiful
For beautiful human life
Pass the baton
That carries life on
Beautiful human life

Love makes us so
Beautiful
Don't turn the tide
Don't stop the ride
Make sure to be
Beautiful
For beautiful human life

What a piece of work is a man
How infinite in faculty
In form and moving how express and admirable
In apprehension how like an angel
In movement how like a god

I won't be here
That's logical
I've had a wonderful life
You made it so
Beautiful
Let's pass the baton
Life carries on

The beauty of the world
The paragon of animals
And yet to me what is this
Quintessence of dust?



Sark E Myth



Signal fade away
Heraldic device
Cancer death of eco-witch
Ch-fff-btch-ch
Vacancy
Hip Victorian crescent
Bewildered apes
I walk with Suzuki in Elysian Fields
He is my World War Three
He is my Weird Al
Not me, not my enemy
Slovak refugee, Waitrose Dundee
Seedcake aisle
Kick me, Belfast!
Several rainy afternoons in hindsight
Gates I failed to open
Books to write
Plastic raincapes in Chinese emporium
Withering plants, forgotten
Small tribes
Scavenging through derelict remains
Of once-great cities
Smokestacks! Smokestacks!
The old hotels
Dead men's underwear
Lies vanquished in corners
Demons strike for decent pay in hell
Bronze statue of me proposed
Kickbacks to Lord Mayor
I saw the backcloth of the stagehand
The grand high commissioner
Edward the Confessor
H. Hesse in mountain lair
You buy! You buy!
The starlight barking
Sarcastic head peacock paces in school corridor
Sark E Myth
Sark E Myth
King Kamerad

Somehow bilge
Waterpumps
Final reduction
Industrial process
And all the hotels are now retro
No spitting on my grave
Though now am dead
I never felt better
Cash or card, phone or watch
Never felt fitter
Now aged 64
Walk with D. Suzuki in hell
Levitation device inventor
Found dead over drawing table
Mother's little helper
Though now am dead
Branded traitor
I never felt better
Icelandic saga written on blue paper
I never felt fitter
A. Warhol was here
Round Table discussing me
Slurred speech
Hail maelstrom
Conspiracy maven
Baksheesh!
I saw the backcloth of the stagehand
Buy your ticket now!
Edward the Confessor
Sub-par FM DJ taken off air
Rabid bags in aftermath
Sark E Myth
Sark E Myth
You will miss me now
Circ pups found in ocean
Industrial process
Even the drugs are now
Retro
I never felt better
Never felt fitter
Flat battery pipped Eiffel
Catholic Klansman in Carphone Warehouse
Raises eyebrow
Hormone replacement therapy
For the weak of will
Sark E Myth
No more pop tart
Fleas size of rat climb on rat size of



Mondegreen



Drugs, guess I can never forgive
But I stay for the sad euphoria
And after all, guess I feel safe, hell yes
It's not some teenage fling

I've been losing, I've been using somehow
Get it in, get it off, get it over again
Here we go, it never gets old
My friends say I'm crazy but they don't sound big
And we both know folks who've flipped out over you again
Euphoria of being in time
Smoking on the highline
In a world of wonder, aquamarine
Everything's going mondegreen
My friends think I'm crazy but I've realised
It's another green world and it's run out of lies

We've got to shout it out
Doubts about
Dancing on borrowed time
We've got to dance 'til the walls
Crumble and fall
Dancing on borrowed time

Hey, get me out of this retro world
I've got a taste for a little danger
And after all you have the nerve
Speaking to me in French
Amidst other lesser sins

I've been losing, I've been using somehow
Get it in, get it off, get it over again
Here we go, it never gets old
Cos I'm only rising on a mountain made out of coke
She's clit-teasing you again
Some kind of pisstake idea of a friend
And I'm only down here to fake my way to grace
Another sly devil with a lovely face
White she buys, black she dies
Since you got old I just cry

We've got to shout it out
Doubts about
Dancing on borrowed time
We've got to dance 'til the walls
Crumble and fall
Dancing on borrowed time

So shout it out
Dance about
Dancing on borrowed time
We've got to dance 'til the walls
Tremble and fall
Dancing on borrowed time

Life's been etching the wrinkles in
And each one's a better story
I've got the walls, guess I feel safe
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
I'm getting closer to things

I've been using, I've been losing you
Get it on, get it in, get it off again
Here we go, it never gets old
I've lived a lot, I've clicked a lot
My heart's been torn like a port in a storm
But I'm on a big liner and it's sailing away without you
I'm on the highline
I've been losing, I've been losing somehow
I've been staggering through the hail
Staying out of trouble, staying out of jail
Dancing through another green world
On another green planet with another green girl

We've got to shout it out
Doubts about
Dancing on borrowed time
Dance 'til the walls
Crumble and fall
Dancing on borrowed time

So shout it out
Doubts about
Dancing on borrowed time
We've got to dance 'til the walls
Tremble and fall
Dancing on borrowed time



Threnody



Yikes! The executioners come wobbling round again
Excited by the stench of burning wafting from your home
And there you sit a-journalling, a-journalling your pain
A-rotting like a butterfly a-trampled down to loam
Trampled down to loam

Strip me like a bachelor and smash me like a glass
We will all be trampled by the gods that we've surpassed
Giddier by the minute, straggling along
See the club-nosed horse-legged nervous stalwart on the throne
A braggart on the throne
A swaggerer on the throne
Trampled down to loam

And so you go a-journalling
A-journalling your pain
Ecolashing panic 'cause
The skunks are here again
Three slim maids, their nakedness
A poisonous display
A long and snaking caravan heading up to Spain
Heading up to Spain

Night becomes electric with metaphors of caves
A double-headed bone flute toots a threnody for the brave
The great grey Groke she flashes as she sweeps across the earth
Crafty eyes, a lofty sea-cap flashing in the fire
Flashing with desire
Flashing 'cross the earth
Flash for all you're worth

Yikes! The executioners come wobbling round again
Excited by the stench of burning wafting from your home
And there you sit a-journalling, a-journalling your pain
A-rotting like a butterfly a-trampled down to loam
Trampled down to loam
Strip me like a bachelor and smash me like a glass
We will all be trampled by the gods that we've surpassed

Strip me like a bachelor and smash me like a glass
We will all be trampled by the gods that we've surpassed
Giddier by the minute, straggling along
See the club-nosed horse-legged nervous stalwart on the throne
A braggart on the throne
A swaggerer on the throne
Trampled down to loam



Canterville



When the little dog goes pick pack pock
And the little owl goes a-flitter flack flock
It's dark in the woods and the clouds go plock
And the people in the cafes have forgotten how to talk
Still the little druggies go a-score score score
Bargain hunters want for more, more, more
But a shitty little dick is still a bore, bore, bore
Night and day

And who's this dingaling at our doorbell?
An old cataclysm we know all too well
Poke its shitty little dick into new fresh hell
The cripplehorse ghost of Canterville

Who's this shitting now through my letterbox?
A puddy little chicken tat in boxer socks
Rub its little nose in a little hemlock
And hope it soon dies of a toxic shock
Never pick a fight with a bot-faced man
You'll get thrashed, chop chop chop
And we'll all work together in a labour camp
But never never titter at the Kommandant

You can never sleep it off
And you're never off sick
But it's better than a poke in the eye with a stick
You're a naughty boy, you spoodge in a sock
Off with your fingers now, chop chop chop!

I read it in the paper, how old Duke Huck
Jumped from the tower by the aqueduct
He was spotted by a plane spraying pesticides
But they always cover up suicides

And who's this ringing at our doorbell?
An old cataclysm we know all too well
Poke its shitty little dick into new fresh hell
The cripplehorse ghost of Canterville

Singing for its supper at our doorbell
That old cataclysm we know all too well
Poke its shitty little dick into new fresh hell
The cripplehorse ghost of Canterville



Chthonian



As I climbed on the metro stair
I met a cove who wasn't there
A grinning half-reptilian
Crustacean with a lizard brain
And he said monsters from deep space
Were the masters of that place
And underground they lurked unseen
And only lived to tap their screens
He said: "Get out while you still can!"
And in fact that was my plan
I tried to scream but couldn't make a sound
Now I'm living underground

Forever, I'm here forever
Unless I wake and it's all been
A chthonian dream

And so I laughed and turned away
And kept on stumbling through my day
I knew I was a citizen
And nothing bad can ever happen to them
But then I walked slap bang into three big gooks
Pointing guns from boiler suits
They said: "You are an alien!"
I'm not a contrarian
So I said nothing and they fired
In slow motion I expired
I tried to scream but couldn't make a sound
Now I'm living underground

Forever, I'm here forever
Unless I wake and it's all been
A chthonian dream

And now I labour with a screen
On ancillary revenue streams
My bitcoin's gone, and I'll admit
I'm a commercial idiot
I have no limbs, I feel no pain
Move the cursor with my brain
But Squarespace tells me I'll make a load
If I give you a discount code
So feel me grabbing at your hand
Dragging you to zombieland
You try to scream but can't make a sound
Now we're here underground

Forever, we're here forever
Until we wake and it's all been
A chthonian dream



Nino Rota



The shadows of persimmons guard the entrance to the day
As if to wave you away
The beast amongst the wheels
The fool upon the heels
Emerges in apologetic sun to the day
The solitude remains
Between Airpods and brain
Nino Rota playing

This electronic inwardness protects you from the fray
As if to wave the world away
The cafes and the exhibitions beckoning you in
Opening a laptop on a bench by the Seine
This solitude remains
Between Airpods and brain
Nino Rota playing

The beast amongst the wheels
The fool upon the heels
Emerges in apologetic sun to the day
Where solitude remains
Hope, solicitude
Nino Rota playing

Don't put on the Ritz
Don't put on the Ritz

On a bench near the Seine
The solitude remains
Between Airpods and brain
Hope, solicitude
Nino Rota playing

Fool on the heels
Nino Rota plays

Fool on the heels
Nino Rota plays
Fool on the heels
Don't put on the Ritz



It's Impossible



Love me, if you love me, slowly
Hold me, if you hold me, near
Take these feelings that control me
Make these feelings disappear

Kiss me, if you kiss me, slowly
Press your lips upon my mouth
Let me be your one and only
Only that will be enough

You must take me, if you take me, gently
And give me all you have to give
For if I could live my life intensely
I wouldn't be afraid to live

Though my life is cold and lonely
Though my life is quiet and still
I dream I have you here to hold me
I know it's impossible

Do whatever you want to me
Kill me, if you kill me, now
For my life and death mean nothing to me
If I can be with you somehow

Touch me, if you touch me, slowly
The passion is too much to bear
Though I'm dreaming I can feel you hold me
As if your arms were really there

You must love me, if you love me, slowly
Love me 'til I nearly die
For if we could see the future clearly
We would be so terrified

Though my life is cold and lonely
Though my life is quiet and still
I dream I have you here to hold me
I know it's impossible

Take me, if you take me, freely
Give me all you have to give
For if ever I could have you really
I wouldn't be afraid to live

The Dinosaurs



Don't you wish you'd done something
Or, indeed, done anything
To save this world you're living in?
You are the dinosaurs

Glaring with that baffled grin
At the comet hurtling in
When it was you who launched the thing
From your fossil cars

It didn't have to end like this
Life on earth was fabulous
Deserts, mountains, oceans, streams
That teemed with precious life

Shed your last few crocodile tears
Stomp through your last few tawdry years
As your life form disappears
You are the dinosaurs

Don't you wish you'd done something
Perhaps invent a time machine?
But at the end of everything
All you make is war
You are the dinosaurs

A Little Rain



"This is the happiest day of my life!"

Everybody's talking 'bout a third world war
What's the point of kicking up a fuss?
It's not a thing that I intend to suffer for
A flash, a puff of smoke, and that's the end of us

A little pain, some heavy rain
And, sure, it won't be very nice at all
But, as they say, a little rain
Into every life must fall

Running round like chickens with your heads cut off
Just because they're sounding the alarm
Either it's a lie or the war's kicked off
Annihilation, where's the harm?

The smoke will clear, life will appear
Or maybe not appear at all
And in a while a little rain
Into nothing much may fall

This Isn't Goodbye



This isn't goodbye
We'll be dying again
I don't know why
And I don't know when

All the time that we killed
We'll kill it again
Heaven knows why
Heaven knows when

These poisonous times
Through which we travailed
Silenced pistols emerged
Through widows' veils

To have taken them on
The scum of the earth
And not come through alive
And not have survived

But this isn't goodbye
We'll be back again
We've lived this before
We'll live it again

That first tentative clinch
At the observatory door
When you gave in an inch
At Mount Palomar

How could we forget
The rush of the hope?
We're reliving it now
In Cinemascope

To have taken them on
The scum of the earth
And not come through alive
And not have survived

But this isn't goodbye
It's just au revoir
They'll need us again
Fighting the power

Our moment will come
To be dying again
Heaven knows why
Heaven knows when



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